The Anniversary Trip Part 5

I had always thought I was a very brave person. I prided myself on my nationality – Ijaw to the core with full Niger Delta bragging rights (Itsekiri mother, Urhobo husband), face fear face???

But see how one trip into the South African bush just floored me. Hubby spent the whole day teasing and laughing at me; ‘please lets go back, let’s get out of here’, became his mantra the whole day as we engaged in other safe, grounded and well researched activities. I knew I had to redeem my image. The integrity of the entire Ijaw nation was at stake here!

So the next day, we headed for water-based activities. I thought to myself, if this doesn’t shut him up nothing else will. After all I was born in the water, a native of Brass Island, swimming like a fish by the time I was 6 months…

That morning as we got ready, hubby complained of a slight headache and didn’t want to go. Of course I have been married to this man for 10 years I keep telling you. No trick in the book is new. There was no way I was letting him get off the water based activities. A whole nation’s integrity, remember?

We got to the resort’s valley of waves and me sef; my liver almost failed me when I saw the water slide! E start from mountain top!! I can’t remember how many meters of it, but I knew I would NEVER get on it. But I didn’t let him see my fear.

So when he suggested that we go on the lazy river first of all, I happily agreed. The lazy river entailed just floating around a lake in a tube. Relaxing, fun, no thumping heartbeats. Then we thought to brave the valley of waves…

I can’t describe it justifiably. It’s a man-made beach where they force the waves out at intervals and you get swept off in it like you really were at sea. Now, I have come home. Of course I dived in, got swept off in the waves, enjoying every moment of it and reminiscing of carefree childhood days spent at the beach in Twon Brass. Hubby busied himself with the pictures.

After a while, I suggested that he try the waves, jump in enjoy the fun. Efian! At that point he reminded me that he had told me he had a very bad headache (I bin think say na slight headache e talk).

‘You don’t seem to understand that my head is really banging, I can’t participate in all these activities today. Why don’t you go on the water slide and I’ll just take pictures?’

Hmmh! That slide again. I cannot let the Ijaw nation down. See how Urhobo man wan fall my hand again today? Shebi you know say ‘Urhobo nor dey carry last?’

Now how do I get out of this and still look brave?

‘Ehm, poor you my darling, this pounding head. Don’t worry about the slide. Let’s get out of the sun so you can go and lie down and I’ll take care of you’…

And that’s how we left the valley of waves. My dignity, integrity and bravery intact! Me sef don learn small Urhobo sense (as my father would say – osobo wayo).

And I’m a good wife. I did look after him oh. Bought him food, drugs, waited for him to sleep and then I took off to the water world and spent an hour on the Jet Ski…

…it’s a wonderful world!